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About Traditional Art / Hobbyist Member Lady Rose18/Female/United States Groups :iconsamusisnotasextoy: SamusIsNotASexToy
Respecting all Video Game Girls
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Mila137
Lady Rose
Artist | Hobbyist | Traditional Art
United States
I have a...
:iconskypeplz: dark_rose137
:icongoogleplusplz: Mila Rose
:icontumblrplz: mila137.tumblr.com
:iconinstagramplz: instagram.com/1377mila
:icontwitterplz: twitter.com/1377mila
:icongmailplz: da.mila137@gmail.com

Hey guys, I'm Mila137 and a strange kid. In short I love dark things and consider myself a goth. I have depression, anxiety and PTSD. Here is the story www.youtube.com/watch?v=Of_JFs… I have social issues but online I can be very friendly. I love helping people. I am very protective of people and things I love and will get very angry very fast ready to get violent if I need to. I love fantasy mainly dragons and elves. I constantly talk, write and draw my "OCs". Technically they are real people I know they are just in a different world. I am Wiccan and believe in other worlds and reincarnation. My username is the first past life I learned of minus the 137. If you start calling my psychopathic you better shut the fuck up. It's my belief and I have a right to it. Here's a more detailed explanation mila137.deviantart.com/journal… My best friends live in another world and I love them to death. I am obsessed with Metroid and Legend of Zelda. I'm also a fangirl of some animes xD . I am also dancer and graduate from my dance school. I am homeschooled and a DA addict so I'm on here a lot. If you wanna know more about me just browse around :)

ANIMATED SUMMARY:
First off, thanks to all those who :+devwatch: me or :+fav: It means a lot to me. Thank you so effin much :blowkiss: So I :blahblah: a lot. I'm a little ball of hyper-manic-ness :boing: I like to :boogie: no, joke, I get my dancing degree in 1 year! I hate to :brushteeth: I'm also kinda... :censored: yea....sorry..... I LOVE my :coffeecup: :crash: happens a lot. Damned netbook. I'm hazordously :crazy: If you needa :cuddle: I'm your girl! Sorry guys, I'm taken :date: :aww: Half my life I'm :excited: If you think I'm weird and a freak, thank you! And :finger: off. I'm also goth so :fusionrock: :skull: :skullbones: and all that good stuff. I tend to :giggle: and :glomp: when provoked. I :love: to :headbang: I give out :hug: like I'm a whore giving out STDs. Careful, I might :tighthug: I love weapons such as :katana: and I know how to use swords and stuff. Love 'em so effin much! :kitty: has been my obsession ever since I was born and it still is. HELLO KITTY!!!! One of my favorite palces is :library: I'm Wiccan and practice many types of awesome philosophy and magic :meditation: I love kitties and have 4 :meow: I adore :music: and it is my life :stereo: I am a :nerd: and so's my boyfriend. Careful with your food cause I will :ninjaeat: Since I have horrible insomnia and never take my pills I'm always :pills: I am always :plotting: about what I really don't know; it varies. I like to :poke: or if you're up to the challenge a :turbopoke: war. I love to :reading: I am part Irish and am very proud of it :shamrock: I'm also cajun which means I like to :party: I love to :sleep: but at all the wrong times. I can be :typerhappy: sometimes so sorry if I ramble. I'm also an author way more than I am an artist :writersblock:
THAT'S ME!!! :bow: :bow: :bow:

Current Residence: My own world
Favourite genre of music: Hard Rock, Symphonic, Symphonic Rock, Folk/Celtic, and Classical
Favourite style of art: Dark Fantasy Photomanipulation
MP3 player of choice: iPod on iPhone
Favourite cartoon character: Hello Kitty
Personal Quote: "If you are truly chosen as you claim, I will risk everything to deny you!" -Midna LoZ TP
Interests

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Journal History

So time for some venting. I've been worse but I've been better. You see, for the past week I have been both suicidal and homicidal. It's not a matter that I'm sick of living. Oddly enough it's a matter of... I simply want to kill someone. Really weird I know. It's kinda scary ^^; It's gotten bad to the point where... well I've ended up hitting my bf :/ Not like slapping him around, more like swaps across the back of the head or bopping the face. See normally I'll play like that but it won't be serious. But the difference is I don't realize that I'm doing it until after its done and I know I'm using it as a venting tool. That doesn't make it right, I'm well aware of that. Today I got fussed at about it really badly. It's not that I want to be doing this. It's just that involuntarily I'll want to hurt someone. Things like punching a pillow or killing in video games won't help. For some reason it just needs to be a body. I need to feel the soft flesh tearing. It's REALLY weird! I know I've always been a sadist but... it just scares me how the urges get stronger with age. I don't want to be a monster but at the same time the idea of harming others is VERY appealing. Gods if this purge shit is real then I'd want a volunteer -.-" 

I think it's just a matter of bottled up frustrations. You see, I started college last week, nothing different. It's my third semester after all. But you see, there are A LOT more people than previous ones. I mean A LOT. Like, at 8:30 AM the parking lot it packed. So this naturally gets me on edge. The classes I have this semester are typical ones (math, computer, theater and art history) so the rest of the students are stereotypical. 

Ok before I go any farther let me explain something here. Where I live there are a lot of black people and I don't mean just colored skin. I mean the ones that are dangerous and trashy. Now I am NOT racist!! I acknowledge that not all black people are like that. Hell, even some white people act like this! But I was just raised with the term "black" not meaning skin color but rather it translates into "black people who are no good like those thugs you see in rap videos" So PLEASE don't go thinking I mean all black people when I use that term ok?

So there are a good few of these black people in my classes. Obviously they look like hood winks so I'm on edge. Then there are the preppy looking people. I even saw an old bully from middle school. Gods I felt so angry when I saw her!! So this all might be a contribution to my anger.

Next is my bf. You see, before school started, I wanted to take a mini vacation. So my boyfriend and I took the long drive to New Orleans to just hang out for two days. I wanted to go to a waterpark but it's only open on weekends T_T We walked around SO much!! Well during the trip I noticed that he was a bit distant. Ok TMI moment here but kind of important. A couple has a hotel for a night, sex is such a stereotypical expectation it's not even funny. Well I got some fun stuff and packed it secretly wanting to have a special time. But we only did it like, once, maybe twice. And they were very short sessions. So that is an indicator for all couples who are sexually active: when the sex is bad something is wrong. The rest of the week he was just focusing on such pointless things. Will he be late for work (he's worrying about this hours before his shift), will he have enough money for the week (yeah, just pan how to spend it), etc. Such random things that don't need to be worried over. Well with him getting distant I naturally got scared that our relationship was going sour again. I didn't want that, I really don't. We have finally begun to pick things up and I want things to stay that way. So I guess hitting him like that was my way of saying "please look at me! I need help!" I mean, I had told him how much bloodlust I was feeling and he really didn't say anything. But he had time to worry about being late 3hr before his shift? It just got me mad. 

Well, I'm feeling cheerful now so I'm good at the moment. Still, I know things haven't been solved. I've just had a crying spell and then slept it off. I'm waiting for it to come back :/
  • Mood: Neutral
  • Listening to: Trust in You by Kaori Sadohara

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:iconruu123:
Ruu123 Featured By Owner Aug 2, 2014  Student General Artist
Thank you for the fav:) it means so much!!! I watched!!
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(1 Reply)
:iconhuntererinful:
huntererinful Featured By Owner Jul 14, 2014  Student General Artist
Thanks for the fave! If you have the time, would you take a look at my gallery? I' really appreciate it. :)
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:iconhirisson:
Hirisson Featured By Owner Jul 11, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thanks for the fave!Ene (Smile) [V7] 
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:iconeternalphoenix96:
EternalPhoenix96 Featured By Owner Jun 20, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thankies for the fave ^^
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(1 Reply)
:iconninjaweretiger:
NINJAWERETIGER Featured By Owner Jun 18, 2014  Hobbyist Traditional Artist
Thank you for the fave! :) (Sorry for the late reply... I have a lot of messages.... ^^;)
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:iconclidjan:
Clidjan Featured By Owner May 28, 2014
Thanks for the favs ^^
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:iconhuntererinful:
huntererinful Featured By Owner May 22, 2014  Student General Artist
Thanks for the fave! If you have the time, would you take a look at my gallery? I'd really appreciate it. :)
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:iconlucyxxnyuu13:
LucyXxNyuu13 Featured By Owner May 8, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Thank youu sooo much for the fave~ :iconrubcheeksplz:
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:iconkrazeeladee:
KrazeeLadee Featured By Owner Apr 16, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thanks for the :+fav: :D
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:iconazi-phale:
Azi-phale Featured By Owner Apr 15, 2014  Student Traditional Artist
-attack hugs- :3
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